Recooperation Charging Batteries

I have realized that I can't be the person that I aim to be want to be, at least not right now. I'm still going through the stages of a crisis situation or whatever you deem suitable to call a reunion trip to your birth family.

1. First step denial
2. Second step schock
3. Third step acceptance

Where I am? Not really sure it depends and changes from day to day... But I suppose it would somewhere between step two and three on a good day and on a really bad day it would be closer two step one...

My stress level has increased significantly ever since my first reunion trip and I didn't expect things to be this way. It wasn't what I had imagined but I was aware of the fact that it would a challenge and at times difficult...

I'm wasting energy on doing nothing, nothing in it's true meaning of the world. When my stress level becomes to great I can do nothing but turn of all emotions and my level of socialization and becomes almost zero.

I wish there was someone I could ame but there is none... In addition decision to go on my first reunion trip for the first time ever seemed to be a good one at the time. I don't regret that I made it, I wish I would have been more prepared for likely outcomes pre reunion.  I wonder if there ever would have been an appropriate time suitable for reunion...


To deal with this I have come the conclusion that I need to make myself into a priority and have to make time for me because my energy is sometimes close to zero...

But oh the pain I feel right now, it's present ever day and when it becomes too heave I tend to get angry at everyone and everything... Oh, the pain I feel


♥쳐음은안녕. Bye for now.♥

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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