We're All In This Together

Regardless of my current life situation I once was abandoned by my birth parents and subsequently placed for adoption. I may have achived something most adoptees only dream about I'm aware of that, but for me personally it didn't turn out the way I expected it to do (if I ever imagined it to be a certain way) even though I have been reunited with my birth family it doesn't take away the pain or confussion from once having been rejected and abandoned.

You can't change what's already happened , but you can begin to focus on the present rather then living in the past. Holding on the past will get you nowhere I know that, it will only result in pain, tears and hurt feelings. I've already wasted the best time of my life and now I'm determined not to let my past define my future...

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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Rose Thorn


Sweden Or Korea

Réunion

Imagine my surprise when I recently discovered that there already is an island called Reunion. Apparently Réunion is a French island La Réunion (previously known as Îlle Bourbon) in the Indian Ocean between Madagascar and Mauritius.

The population make up to about 800000 people, and how come I never knew about this island at all... The president in La Réunion is Didier Robert and the capital city of Réunion is Saint Denis and its currency is Euro.

To be in reunion is confussing, if anything there's so many things that gets lost on the way, things that might be agreed upon but that I don't have a clue of and unfortunately the same thing goes for me. There's just as many things I tend to take for granted things that are unthinkable for my siblings. It's not because of lack of dedication or love but I didn't imagine that the road would get so confussing and unclear. At times I've actually wanted to almost turn the time back about 10 years or so but that would make me a teenage girl...

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

Related posts:


Relative Deprivation


Relative Choice

Sweden or Korea

Hanguk saram or Sweden saram... I'm not sure, I guess I'm somewhere inbetween. I wish there was a way for me to honour my birth culture while still maintaining the culture where I've grown up... I'm not sure exactly how I will accomplish that , I will try believe me I will.

Up until recently I was fooled to believe that my birth parents wanted me to settle down with a nice Korean man. Maybe it's a nice thought more than anything, a part of me wishes that I could honour my culture that way but I realize that there might be so many things I would have to foresake and for what .... The truth is that I never would allow any man to treat me as they would see fit, I certainly wouldn't obey my husband if I didn't like what he decided for me. I would make my own decisions, and I would never stay married if my husband obused me or started hitting me. If I would have to get a divorce to get happy I would not hesitate.

Although I like the idea of marriage and eternal love, these days not many marriages lasts that long. If I ever would consider marriage I would only like to get married once and then stay married. But I could just as well imagine myself living in a consensual union or common law marriage with children. In Sweden many people live like this.

Recently I asked my Swedish mum and dad weither or not they thought my mother and father would like me to settle down with a Korean man. But my parents ensured me that, they seemed to not be concerned with that any longer they might have but now what seems to matter is my happiness.
Most parents wants nothing else then to see their children happy. I wonder if that goes for my birth parents as well. Do I have to honour Korean traditions or is my happiness more important ?


© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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Orphan Girl

Rose Thorn

Relative Choice

How can you move on in life as an adoptee ? What choices do you have ?
I don't think there's any bad or better choices, all choices are just as good as long as they are made by the adoptee and nobody else. As people grows older they are presented with different choices all the time.

Do I want to find my birth family or not ? Do I have to look for them... Do I want to return the country of my birth... Do I have to return to my birth country...

If you were to ask my younger brother those questions I think he would just shake his head and answer no and that should be allright.

I fantasize a lot, I have a big imagination too and lately I begun to to imagine an island with the name Reunion for all of those that has managed to be reunited with a long lost one, in particular adoptees. And every time it becomes difficult or strained or whatever I imagine myself getting in a boat ready to leave the island or at least to get all my packing done.. in case I'd like to leave... Because reunion is not just a happy place and ending, it can be frustrating, difficult, energy consuming, emotionally difficult, confussing and bittersweet.

I'm not sure how big that island would be or how many the inhabitants of such an island would be, I guess it would have to be pretty big but I don't think new settlers would arrive every day and maybe people would be have some sort of communal living... I'm not sure to be totally honest...

Reunion island would be located in a warm climate with palm trees and no winter climate or snow (at least the island I'm talking about..)

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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Relative Deprivation


A Name

Rose Thorn

Life Quotes

With enough courage, you can do without a reputation - Rhett Butler, Gone With the Wind 

 Life well spent is long - Leonardo da Vinci 

 To live is so startling it leaves little time for anything else - Emily Dickinson

Your life is what your thoughts make it - Marcus Aurelius 

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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Sorrow Words

A Fool

Humble Pie

I recently made a Chocolate Pie for Father's Day so maybe you could say it's a Humble Pie, because Chocolate is supposed to make you happy and if you're happy you're nicer, right?

It's going to be Christmas soon, and in Sweden there's a saying that a Gingerbread cookie makes you nice.

Ta en pepparka så att du blir snäll.

I do believe everyone deserves a second chance, and you shouldn't be to fast when judging people. Or why judge them at all but ultimately we all could use a piece of humble pie now and again.... Even me and I don't think it makes me a bad person...

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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Chocolate Cupcakes

Summer Baking

Chocolate Scones

Thursday 24st

Mario and Nesty Never Say Goodbye

I know it's a pretty old song from 2006 from the drama My Girl (but I still like it not just for the actors but for the meaning and message of the song.) Sometimes when words isn't enough I think it's better to let the music sing and say it with song...

Oh, and it's only a month left before Christmas Eve and Christmas presents (in Sweden we open them on the 24st).

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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Not Sad

메신저안해요

What's In A Name

The Name Saga will probably never end, I realize that now; I was somewhat of a fool too not realize that things will become more complicated it has become so much more complicated to do even simple things like planning a an overseas trip, even getting mail is more of a hassle now. Why ?

Because I'm the , only one in Sweden with is name and I think I might be the only one in the entire world with this particular combination of names. I still think it was worth it, I feel more true to myself and I naivëly think that my birth family ses this as some kind of dedication. Hey, I'm proud to be Korean but I might even be the most prooud of my birth family, I want them to know that I considers myself to be a part of their big family. Although I'm not entirely sure if they really are or at least not in the way I'd like them to be. I know that my birth family are tremendously proud of the fact that they have one younger sister in Sweden and by removing not changing my name that obvious link to Sweden becomes less obvious.

I used to be anonymous whith a really Swedish sounding name, not only am I now no longer anonymous; because of my name people tend to get confused and I suppose I'm getting stereotyped. Maybe I was to naivë or stubborn or maybe even way ahead of my time I suppose society aren't used to people choosing to do exactly what I did.

My name no longer makes it possible to guess what nationality I am, it no longer sounds Swedish because I chose to change it that way. It might sound more English or American if anything although my surname and one of my names are Swedish. But I guess that doesn't count because I could be one of those mailorder brides that chose to get married to an ethnic Swede or maybe a second generation immigrant (but in reality I'm neither of it, I'm a first generation immigrant caused by adoption.

I know for a fact that I'm not the only Korean adoptee that changed their personal name back, but I guess it's not that common to have that many names. Ultimately it's my life and I should be able to make certain decisions by myself.Funnily enough, one of my names was in the Swedish almanack but since it wasn't a name that my adoptive parents choice they just dismissed the hole idea. Usually a Name Day or Namnsdag is a really big deal in Sweden the equivalent of a Birthday. At least in my family it used to be that way...

Anyways, I suppose I should be grateful that I was able to complete a namy change if anything, although neither of my families supported it or understood it. My birth family as well as my adoptive parents tried to persuade me to do otherwise. Somehow my name change seemed to really hurt my Swedish grandma...

If ever do decide to change my mind and want my anonymous I could always apply for a dissolvement of my name change which actually is free. In my mind I wonder if there is another way to join my two families togheter and if there's another way to handle this issue with a personal name.

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle        

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Wash Away


Wish I Knew  

Orphan Girl

A Fool

A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool. 

Yet another quote by Shakespeare, its still very useful and full of honesty I think.

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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Sorrow Words

메신저안해요

네동송 용서하닙시오.

용서해주세요 아버자.

오빠 마안해요.

사랑합니디.

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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해피할로원

Orphan Girl

Rose Thorn

Rose Thorn

I will not lie,I love my birth family more then life itself, it's true I truely do. But our relationship is complicated , mostly due to cultural differences caused by my adoption. And I realized that although I love them, it hurts to love them, physically painful with real tears.

Yet it's also wonderful to know that I have them, such a warm fuzzy feeling knowing that I got such a big family on the other side of the world; knowing that there are people on the other side of the world that loves me. That's commendable , yet understandable but not without confussion and pain. 
And yes it's also time consuming, loving them reminds me somehow uncounsiously of what could have been, of all the things I lost.

Yes I still say lost although I'm all to aware of what I got in return, I will not apologize for any of that any longer. I deserve it, I should not have to feel guilty for things that's way beyond my control. The last thing I should have to do is to feel guilty for having been born as a girl 25 years ago. But maybe it's easy to feel this way given the history I have and the fact that the world is a patriarchy. No, I'm not bitter.

My pain is nothing in comparison too that of my parents and in relation to my younger brother's. The responsability that rests upon their shoulders, I can't imagine it or see it before me. All I know is that they are going to have to support our parents after graduated and having completed military service. Then I guess they'll have to get married as well to ensure that the family line lives on. Such a huge responsability, and in all this I wonder where I get into the picture... What do they expect of me ? Can I ever become a filial daughter or is that no longer possible ?

I am not a perfect person, everybody have flaws and I'm no better than anybody else.

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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Orphan Girl


Relative Deprivation

Korea Old And New

Korea Old And New, A History

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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Simon Winchester

Keith Pratt

Relative Deprivation

Ok, so yes I've studied Peace and Development at university level... but this doesn't mean that my interests are limited (to Peace and conflicts, Korea and adoption.) No far from it, I have many other interests of course.

But allright, here goes would it be possible to put the Relative Deprivation in relation to adoption ? Well, yes I think it's duable but also since adoptions usually takes place at time when the children are relatively young I guess more than assume that it's near to impossible to change your own situation (it might not be impossible but complicated and hard).

Deprivation is a way to measure somebody's happiness or level of content in relation to somebody that has something that the deprived want like fulfillment of a basic need or access to it.


http://www.change.org/petitions/citizenship-for-all-us-intercountry-adoptees#

But the thing with being adopted that I've found myself is that you can't change something that happened before you were born or a very young child (there are exceptional cases were adoptions have been dissolved but that's usually decided by the adoptive parents citizenship) it's very time consuming and hard to change something that's been around for 60 years that people by now are used too and that over time has turned into something of a system in this case the adoption system.

In case you're wondering my adoptive parents who I still prefer to call mum and dad, I know they love me and my brother more than anything. I think they would walk over fire if it could help me or my brother, they have supported me throughout my life, it was them not me that suggested I'd go to Korea and meet my birth family last year. They are still not happy about some of my choices that I've made but thats allright. Yet my previous Korea trip did really put things into perspective and my relationship with my Mamma and Pappa has improved tremdously and we can know communicate more honestly with each other.

The Name Saga still continues on... I'll write about it soon (it deserves it's own entry although it's somewhat linked).

 Also I'm Swedish which ABBA also are and ABBA songs happen to make me smile and feel good, especially Mamma Mia the Musical.

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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Orphan Girl

When I was born the only people that once knew about me were my birth parents and one other person. Nobody else knew that I was to be born, I don't even know if they even expected me to be alive when I was born to start with let alone survive and continue to live on. But I did, although I did spend my first 100 days in an orphanage so my birth parents never had a chance to bond with me, or create memories with me. All they had was blurred memories and hope...

Therefore it might seem strange that I feel so strongly about my birth family since we logically have nothing else in common other then a last name and some unknown DNA. Some days I still wonder if the parents and the siblings that I met truely are my birth family, it's sometimes hard for me accept it as the truth... I don't know exactly why, could be because I never had the slightest memory or recollection of them but what do you expect from a newborn baby.

I guess that I managed to turn things around, seeing that my birth parents might not even have been aware of my health status.But I wasn't stillborn or dying or seriously sick, I was fine. I guess I was born as an underdog but now I'm pretty pleased with my life.
Now I appreciate the little things in life and I try too approach every day with a smile. (I'm the orphan girl that was reunited) and still in active reunion.

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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Honey Honey

Honey honey, how you thrill me, ah-hah, honey honey
Honey honey, nearly kill me, ah-hah, honey honey
I'd heard about you before
I wanted to know some more
And now I know what they mean, you're a love machine
Oh you make me dizzy

Honey, honey let me feel it, ah-hah, honey honey
Honey honey, don't conceal it, ah-hah honey honey
The way that you kiss goodnight
(The way that you kiss me goodnight)
The way that you hold me tight
(The way that you're holding me tight)
I feel like I wanna sing when you do your thing

Idon't wanna hurt you, I don't wanna see you cry
So stay on the ground, girl, you better not get too high
But I'm gonna stick to you, boy, you'll never get rid of me
There's no other place where I rather would be

Honey honey, touch me me, baby, ah-hah, honey honey
Honey honey, hold me, baby, ah-hah, honey honey
You look like a movie star
(You look like a movie star)
But I know just who you are
(I know just who you are)
And honey to say the last you're dog-gone beast

http://www.lyricsfreak.com/a/abba/honey+honey_20003047.html

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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Our Last Summer

Not Sad

I'm not sad anymore, or I'm trying to stay positive and focus on the good things in life which might be noticed in this blog by now. I still struggle with the adoption and reunion related stuff , and I will still blogg about those topics but maybe less often. I'm not really sure what the future holds in store for me but I'm ready for whatever challenge life throughs at me. Remember this there's at least two people in the world that loves you.

My struggle as an adoptee will most likely never end, I'm still trying to make sense of the world which is easier said then done. There are still so many things that I don't know anything about, I know that but I also know that there things that I have knowledge about that others might not know about. That is allright, I'm not complaining it's how life is supposed to be.

But I still can't shake the feeling of feeling totally alone ( I know I'm not alone there's many , many other KADs out there) but sometimes it feels like I'm the only one out there having the kind of feelings, emotions and opinions not only about Korea and adoption but about life in general.

And it is true that despite everything, there was a few days in Korea where I felt I could let my guard down a bit and relax instead of worrying about what someone might said or if I misunderstood something. I spent the last week in KOROOT which to me proved to be very needed it gave me some distance to my active reunion and all of the tension it created. However the impressions from last week was never negative yet sometimes difficult and truthfully I couldn't process it until I was back in Sweden.

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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Seoul 2011 Part I

As promised here are a few of my many pictures from my previous Korea trip. Enjoy!

(c) Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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Trust

Totally unrelated but still important; Happy Father's Day !!!

I've been busy with a bit soul searching since my return to Sweden, and I realize that I'm too naïve for my own good sometimes, but also brutally honest. More importantly I discovered that I need to prioritize and also re-evalute my life. Simply speaking, I need to become more egoistic than I have been in the past.

It's not easy to live in active reunion with your birth family, I'm not sad anymore but I still worry and mourn. I think it's a part of life for many adoptees and not uncommon at all. Some of my friendships hasn't been exactly healthy , I realize that now. I don't blame either of them, fact is that negativity attracts negativity... And well need I say more... I'm not depressed or sad anymore, honestly I'm not. When you can't be the person that you really are with other people then I think that friendship might not really be that good.

I'm sorry I can't be there for you anymore like I used to be, I need to become my own hero. There'll never be a knight in shining armour on a white horse, those endings are only for fairytales. I don't think this is the end but this is going nowhere, one of us is gotta have to change...

What I'm trying to say is that when you have enough to deal with, it might not be such a good idea to surrond yourself with people that steal your energy.

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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End

Geochang

I used to really honestly hate my birthday, yes it's sounds weird but I used to despise it, I'm not kidding. You see my birthday used to remind of soo much pain, so much sorrow; separation. People that I should have known but never got a change to know... I still don't like my birthday although I know you're supposed to do it.

Every birthday reminds me of what should have been, but also of what I gained in return so it's bittersweet like most things in life.

Geochang 거창군 should have been the place where I would have been born, you see my parents lived there at the time. Had I been born there I suspect my life wouldn't really be my life or at least not the life I know as mine today. 


I'm the only one of my siblings that wasn't born at home , my older siblings never knew of me. Yet I'm so thankful of all the things I got in return but the loss of what I lost is still real and very painful in my mind, heart and soul. 


© Taste of Kimchi, Elle


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 나의가촉


Seoul

Dum Vivimus, Vivamus

Dum vivimus, vivamus - let us live while we live - let's enjoy life.

신나는 빼빼로 데이 ! 

©Taste of Kimchi, Elle


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Our Last Summer

The summer air was warm and soft
The feeling right, the Paris night
Did it's best to please us
And strolling down the Elysée

We had a drink in each café
And you
Talked of politics, philosophy and I
Smiled like Mona Lisa
We had our chance
It was a fine and true romance

I can still recall our last summer
I still see it all
Walks along the Seine, lauging in the rain
Our last summer
Memories that remain

We made our way along the river
And we sat down in the grass by the Eiffel tower
I was so happy we had met
It was the age of no regret
Oh yes, those crazy years, that was the time
Of the Flower Power
But underneath we had a fear of flying
Of getting old, a fear of slowly dying
We took the chance
Like we were dancing our last dance

I can still recall our last summer
I still see it all
In the tourist jam, round the Notre Dam
Our last summer
We could laugh and play

And now you're working in a bank
The family man, the fotball fan
And your name is Harry
How dull it seems
You're the hero of my dreams

http://www.lyricsfreak.com/a/abba/our+last+summer_20002942.html

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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10 Years From Now

• I'll be in a stable relationship 
• I will live in Korea 
• I will have my own business (in Korea)
• I probably will have a child or two

It might seem strange that I am dedicated towards moving to a country that couldn't care for me as a newborn. I admit that my feelings is a little bit mixed but overall the positive feelings that I felt weighed more than the negative ones. Honestly, it felt so relieving to be able to live life like that. Or no, it was more a feeling a sensation deep inside me in my soul, I feeling of total satisfaction. I felt complete and calm, maybe I felt calm because I felt complete and the reverse... 

Of course if one wants to learn Korean the best why would be to study Korean in Korea, obviously. But there are other ways to learn it; you can apply to study it in university or try to find a Korean language course through some other facility not necessarilly a school and there's many online options out there. I know I will learn Korean one day, I've already started. I have to learn Korean or else my relationship with my birth family will never improve, I fear. I am confident that I'll make it happen one day. You have to be dedicated and stay positive.

I honestly think it's about time that I focus more on some me time, or at least try to make myself a priority and doing things that makes feel good instead of doing things to make others feel good (if it means I'd have to forsake myself).

©Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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This Has To End

I wish I wasn't such a varm, good hearted person, especially not since I tend to be openly friendly towards other people; almost naïve which makes a fool and a listener. I think I need to thoughen up a bit or two, there's reason to focus on what has been when you can't change it; focus on the good things that make you feel happy and calm (live for the moment and plan for the future.) Too me every day is an adventure, and I plan to live like that. There's never a dull moment if you're trying to smile instead of crying.

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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Peace & Love

I made one really major and life altering decision in connection to my last Korea trip, some of you may think it's silly and naïve and all that but to me it was like an epiphany, suddenly everything made sense. I knew what I wanted and where I wanted to go in life. My life in Sweden has been a very good one, I had nothing to complain about not really (expect for the ordinary adoption issues) of course. But my mum and dad really are the best parents that I ever could have gotten. I can't imagine having any other parents, honestly I know mum and I don't get along most of the times and that I might give her a hard time oftentimes. But I truely wouldn't change them or want it any other way. I love my mum and dad, 아버지, 어머니, 언니 and 형제.

But here's the big thing, like major or something of that sort, despite everything that happened I still feel like I not only want to return (I'm convinced that I will). No, I'm talking about living there

as a foreign resident not as a tourist but living there permanently for a shorter amount of time for exactly how long is yet to be determined. But I felt at ease and at peace there , I'd like to bring that feeling permanently in too my life. And yes, it also felt like I left a piece of my heart in Korea, which is kind of true since I forgot and left a few things there. 

I realize that it might take some time before I actually can achive that, and I suppose we're talking years here. And I'm not naïve, I am also avare of the fact that might mean I'd have to make sacrifices that I'm more then willing too take. At least I have a goal in life now, which I didn't use to have and that's worth a lot in my book.

And rest assure I will make it happen, one day I'll be living in Korea.

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle 


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Tying The Knot

Maybe that's the only way I can redeem myself, is this what I need to do to make you forgive me? I mean, I think I really missbehaved so utterly much. Maybe you're even crushed now, but it was never may intention to cause you deliberate pain or drag your family honour into the dust. Allright, I might just be overexaggerating a bit or two but honestly it's really how ashamed I felt or still feels.

Being a filial daughter can't be that hard can it, you need to obey your parents then may ask which parents am I supposed to obey then ? What if they can't agree on what I should do? I refuse to get married to stranger, and in case of marriage you havn't gotten to know a person well enough after only 3 months. Besides I wouldn't just grab some random guy, just to get that of my cheast. And at the moment I don't plan to get married any time soon, I'm not even dating now so there's one big component missing here.

나는 마흔육일 안에 남자를 찾을 수 있습니다 . And there's a reason why this sentence is written in Hangul, I'll say no more. 

©Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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Give Sorrow Words

Give sorrow words. The grief that does not speak
Whispers the o'er-fraught heart, and bids it break. 

 A countenance more
In sorrow than in anger.

 Parting is such sweet sorrow,That I shall say good night till it be morrow.

Nobody can express themselves like Shakespeare, right now it's just a beautiful quote.

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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What Can I Do

What can I do now? I know for sure I should do something, but how can I explain ? Will you even understand or be willing to listen ? Read my words to hear what's on my mind ? I know that I did you wrong many times. I'm really, really sorry if it caused you any pain or worry. If you cried for me, I'm sorry. 언니, please forgive your stupid 여동생...

어머니와 아버지, please don't be mad if I made you feel ashamed or make you mad. I was not raised in Korea so I don't know your customs or how a filial daughter should behave... 죄송합니다... And yes in reality we're nothing else than strangers by a strange twist of fate...


Would you understand if I told you about my future plans ? Would you be willing to respect them ? Would you be able to offer me emotional support and guidance? It finally feels the clouds on my sky are drifting away, I will try not to nag or mourn any longer.  And I will be bold enough to say that I'll get the things I want, I'll make sure I get them. 알았어 ? 


© Taste of Kimchi, Elle 

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Spoiler Agents & Stalemates

All I want to do is to live a normal life without having to worry; constantly looking over my shoulder , covering my tracks... Sometimes it seems like I can't escape my past,it's always there reminds me when I least expect it but this time I decided I'll no longer play the victim in my life I'll try to be the bigger person. The best person and version of me that I can be, I'll start by doing something radical; positive thinking and a big smile... I won't allow things from my childhood to continue being skeleton's in my closet anymore. Hey, common that's like 10 or 15 years ago, surely people would have changed by now...

And about something I said some days ago and just for the record hypothetically speaking I wouldn't be repeating my 어머니's destiny if I was to become pregnant without a husband or ring on my finger. My 어머니 was married and I'm not so it would be much worse if I at one point in time would end up pregnant. And I'm not really sure why I mentioned that in this entry because the first subject is not related to my 어머니 or my future destiny. Or at least I hope it's not related, and I'm not that kind of girl.

Sometimes I feel like I would be able to feel significantly better, more positive if I just surrounded myself with the right kind of people, made the right kind of friends. I know I am a positive and happy person, deep down with a bubbly personality it's just that I have a tendency to get stuck in what has been and negative thinking which gets more intense if I am surrounded by people who share that trait. I whish I had more positive people in my life but I don't , I'm basically just complaining now. It would be really easy to just break it of with all those people that makes me feel and think in a negative way, but I can't do that. Because it's what I always have done. I always escape or run away when I feel uncomfortable or when it gets difficult, besides I can't just abandon people just because they may feel as bad as I do because I don't think it's what friends are supposed to.

Behind a big smile, a thousand tears may hide...

©Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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Greif Again

Chocolate Scones

No it's not chocolate and scones, it's Chocolate scones... Freshly made out from the owen, the first thing I baked since being back. Although it's not Korean.

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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Things I Wish I Knew...

I wish someone could have told my 15th year old self a thing or two, life gets better but 10 years later I still havn't figured out life's mystery. I hope I'm not as naïve as I was when I was a child, but I know I still have many more things to learn about life and everything in between. But I wish someone could have told me that I would find my birth family in just a couple of years time and that I would get a chance to meet them twice.

What do you think should anyone be encouraged to have children ? Do all people make good parents ? Why is it that after having married or been together for a while people oftentimes decide to start a family. What's with that I seriously don't get it !? Is the maning of life to have an offspring?

What about those people that decide that parenthood isn't for them are their lives then pointless... ? Is a life without children meaningless... Please, I beg to differ, or maybe someone would be brave enough to try to convince me that everything comes down to that: biology and children...

In my Korean family I'm the youngest girl, and yes everyone still tend treat me as a child which is a bit annoying when 25 years old. My older siblings are currently having to work to help support the family as our brother's try to finish their education so that they can support our parents and the rest of the family. It's not something to argue about it is what is expected of a filial daughter or son especially....

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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