I wonder weither or not it is true that I am in fact traumatized at some level, although I can't say for sure weither I really am or how it shows itself. But maybe uncounsely I might be although I'm not sure of exactly how much an infant can have had time too experience in just three months....
I might be, that could explain a lot of things for me but I suppose that's one more question that I'll never know for sure. Maybe I should have recognized my Omma's voice since I assume that she was talking and that I must have heard her voice while she was pregnant with me...
Of course I could have recognized it unconsciously without knowing it for sure.
If it's really true or not I can't really say, traumatized or not the truth is that it hurts to think about these things. I wish there was an effective way to aviod it, but sadly reality can't be ignored since reality is life. Sometimes some aspects of adoption hurts to think about from time too time others are always hurting. Like a heart beat pounding in someone's cheast or dripping water from a tap, branches blowing in the wind tapping on the window....
© Taste of Kimchi, Elle
Related posts
Challenge
Conspiracies
Blame
Separation
No comments:
Post a Comment