Monday, 7 March 2011

Tears Of Joy And Tears Of Sorrow

Mum, the more you try to press me against your chest, the tighter you hold on too me... the more I'm going too turn away from you. Don't ignore your fear, I know you're fear has materialized now, don't play charades acknowledge your pain and the truth as we both know it.

To you and dad I'm considered a miracle, but to someone else the loss or rather the timing of my birth meant separation, sorrow and despair. I was never meant to reast in your arms, I was made from someone else's flesh and blood. The very first words I heard before my birth was not words uttered by you or dad but rather by Omma and Appa, in a language I pressume I knew then but that I now no longer knows...

The tears you've cried for me was tears created out of joy, but the tears my Omma must have cried, she has been forced to keep inside her must have been established out sorrow and despair.

Two women, in different parts of the world, totally unaware of each other yet linked to one another by the very reason. Someone's joy is established because of someone else's tragedy. Let's not forget that.

They say water is thicker than blood, but to me blood is still thicker than water... But yet, mum rest assure thay you still have a place in my heart, but I'm should be capable of loving more than just you and dad. Mum, I don't blame you, it's possible that you're going through every adoptive parents nightmare... I'm sorry for causing you the pain, but I will not go back to the ways thing used to be before. That would be impossible.

This was supposed to go on yesterday's post but seeeing that already had achieved quite a length, I'll write it now instead. In Sweden we have an annual sking race which attracts many athlets from all over the world. In Swedish it is called Vasa Loppet after the King Gustav Vasa who is remembered as to having taken the same road centuries ago...

A few years the organizers have been forced to import snow, seeing that there was none left, yet only one year has the race had to be canceled due to complete lack of snow. This year's winners were Jorgen Brink and Jenny Hansson.

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

Related posts:



Fourth Separation

Pain And Greif

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