Sunday, 10 July 2011

That's The Way The Cookie Crumbles

My motto in life is to treat others as you would like to be treated... or else I suppose you might end up in something best described as that's the wat the cookie crumbles...

The biggest IKAA Gathering so far will begin in about a month (give or take (book the date 12th - 15th August).

What happens then ?

The Swedish Korean Adoptees Organization will celebrate their 25th anniversery (it's the oldest NGO for Korean adoptees). It's the oldest NGO for Korean adoptees so it could be really special.

I will not be attending myself, (although I seriously thought about it for a second) it's somewhat expensive and I don't know that many people irl besides I'm saving my money from my upcoming trip. I think that would be much more fun, I've never been much for partying...

Lately I've become more active in the blogosphere ( I've started reading adoptee blogs and what's more started commenting). I'm still not sure what people would think of me, what they associate me with... All I know is what I am, although someone else would have to fill in the rest here.

This might sound incredibly stupid but I actually miss all the things I could have been ...
a real sister to my birth siblings and younger daughter to Omma and Appa. It really doesn't matter how hard I try to attempt to recreate that feeling , because I can't turn back time or make things undone. My life isn't a bad dream although it might have started as one.

That's a hard thing to swallow, but that's my life and I know I will still struggle trying to come to terms with this (which to me is the true essence of adoption). I realize I might have to have to pat my back , move on (the best I can) and try to get over this but as this really is my life it won't be easy... But I'll try my best, at least I'm not alone , by reading other adoptee blogs and that's a small comfort...

Or maybe I'm doing it all wrong (there's no How To books on how to get through life as an adoptee or not even a general solution) instead we have to learn by living...

© Taste of Kimchi, Elle

Related posts:

Catch 22

Discount Adoptee

Bending Over

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