I've recently started watching Adoption Stories, and the few episodes I've seen so far hasn't said anything about the adoptee being grateful, it's the oppositie the prospective parents are portrayed as being extremely grateful and lucky because they've basically been able to become parents and a real family.
But what's a real family ? These days it's hard to tell, especially in the Western World and also growing number of divorces. However this wasn't really what I wanted to discuss. In one of the episodes there was a couple with one biological daughter that eventually settled on Korean adoption.
Their main argument for their final selection was that Korean children and infants aren't placed in orphanages like most orphans generally are percieved to be. Instead the couple has been told that Korean children are placed in foster homes and are being taken care of by the foster mum. Seems ideal, I suppose if it wasn't for the fact that there actually are orphanages for Korean orphans too. Why else would they be called orphanages !? The reason I know this for a fact is that I prior to adoption over 20 years ago, spent approximately 3 months in an orphanage starting from my birth and until my adoption.
Of course this was almost 25 years ago, so maybe things could have changed but there will always be if not orphanages in Korea at least institutions as Koreans my be more easilly influenced or pushed into such a decision. Actually the number of foster homes and foster mothers in Korea is not eqivallent to that of Korean orphans... Maybe they never will, as of right now they have quite a distance to leap.
Unlike me, my brother was born several years later and he was placed in foster home, but in his case his mother made a concious decision to place her son up for adoption. While I wasn't even given the chance to rest on my mother's cheast, I didn't have a chance to snuggle with her, I didn't scream to make my announcemennt to my parents, I did scream for born though. At least that's what I imagine that I did, I didn't get a chance to get a first glance even at my Appa and Omma and niether were they.
Instead I was to become a hidden family secret, returning over 20 years later at Korean age 26. For that long I was my family's big shame and tabboo. There could be a small possibility that this has made me screwed up, but I wouldn't necessarilly call that a failor as I have been doing pretty good in life up until now.
And I'm aware of the fact that are a lot of strange things hidden backstage or stowed away, discrepancies in the Korean adoption system. And this post did fulfill it's purpose but that's only the top of the iceberg. There is still more subjects to be touched and talked about were the general awareness is next to null.
Maybe, just maybe I'll put this blog on hold when there is nothing more to talk about, no more topics to written and discussed. Only then it seems as if this blog wouldn't be updated as regularly. But never deleted. But like I said it seems as if that decision isn't like to establish itself in the near future or even years to come.
And yes, it could that the agencies that handles Korean American adoptions delibrately chooses to place the young ones in foster homes instead of orphanages. Yet there actually is a shortage of Korean foster mother's which means that a majority of the young ones can't be placed in foster homes but has to be placed at an institution or orphanage. And to be placed at orphanage ight be something that many Korean adoptees have in common, yet I believe the percentages of such a placement has decreased among the younger KADs. But orphanages will always exist.
I have a voice and I'll continue to use as long as there's a need and a purpose for it.
Worringly, is that mum's beloved cat is missing since two days now, hopefully the cat isn't hurt...
© Taste of Kimchi, Elle
Related posts:
Gratefulness
Sunday, 10 April 2011
Saturday, 9 April 2011
The Other Case Of Greatfulness
There's so much talk about adoptees being in some kind of greatfulness and unequal relationship to their adoptive parents. But I actually believe that if it hadn't been for adoptees birth mum's intention to surrender her child or some random unfortunate event or both that child would never have been given up for adoption.
So who than would have to feel greatful? The supposed orphan and future adoptee or the adoptive parents?
It's a really big thing for a mother or any parents to willingly give up their child (or so I like to think).
Then it only seems logical for the adoptive parents to feel some kind of gratitude and greatfulness because if that woman hadn't made such a decision, that particular child and adoptee would never have been adopted and become a part of that particular family.
Yet I realize that one; being an adoptee means that it very likely that are a living contradiction, and if adoption is something that has to happen I think that it might become easier if the adoptee and the adoptive family is of the same ethnicity. Possibly it could also be so that adult adoptees might have a better understanding if they were to adopt themselves, although it might also make things more difficult if one parent is an adoptee.
I'm not trying to disrespect adoptive parents as much as I might intiatally have come across as in this entry, I'm trying to explain that adoption is a really complex thing and a great challenge and responsibility that's all.
© Taste of Kimchi, Elle
Related posts:
Epiphany
Diamond
Return
Circle
So who than would have to feel greatful? The supposed orphan and future adoptee or the adoptive parents?
It's a really big thing for a mother or any parents to willingly give up their child (or so I like to think).
Then it only seems logical for the adoptive parents to feel some kind of gratitude and greatfulness because if that woman hadn't made such a decision, that particular child and adoptee would never have been adopted and become a part of that particular family.
Yet I realize that one; being an adoptee means that it very likely that are a living contradiction, and if adoption is something that has to happen I think that it might become easier if the adoptee and the adoptive family is of the same ethnicity. Possibly it could also be so that adult adoptees might have a better understanding if they were to adopt themselves, although it might also make things more difficult if one parent is an adoptee.
I'm not trying to disrespect adoptive parents as much as I might intiatally have come across as in this entry, I'm trying to explain that adoption is a really complex thing and a great challenge and responsibility that's all.
© Taste of Kimchi, Elle
Related posts:
Epiphany
Diamond
Return
Circle
Friday, 8 April 2011
Adoption Circle
Once you're in it, you can't get out.
(A) you either start promoting, lobbying or believing in the abolishment of adoption.
(B) you can only relate to other adoptees or even same ethnicity adoptees which means you either married a fellow adoptee or have nothing but adopted friends.
(C) you don't believe establishment of adoption is a neccessarilly good thing yet you havn't ruled out adoption yourself.
(D) you're pretty well intergrated into your adoptive country (society, culture), you don't have a big interest in adoption, reunion and/or birth family search. You're adopted, but you identify the most with your new culture. You're friends and partner are all of that culture (which in my case would mean 100 % Swedish).
It's about time that adoption gets its rightful media coverage because its nothing else than a Western concept. I like to state that I'm not resentful to either of my families, but the process of achiving an almost equal coexistance hasn't been easy. Respect is a word that comes to mind.
And I don't neccessarilly like to label people so this entry should be seen as an attempt to identify different values found among adoptees not to place this and that person in one of these sections.
© Taste of Kimchi, Elle
Related posts:
Swedish Agencies
Glossary
Portrayals
Adoption & Religion
(A) you either start promoting, lobbying or believing in the abolishment of adoption.
(B) you can only relate to other adoptees or even same ethnicity adoptees which means you either married a fellow adoptee or have nothing but adopted friends.
(C) you don't believe establishment of adoption is a neccessarilly good thing yet you havn't ruled out adoption yourself.
(D) you're pretty well intergrated into your adoptive country (society, culture), you don't have a big interest in adoption, reunion and/or birth family search. You're adopted, but you identify the most with your new culture. You're friends and partner are all of that culture (which in my case would mean 100 % Swedish).
It's about time that adoption gets its rightful media coverage because its nothing else than a Western concept. I like to state that I'm not resentful to either of my families, but the process of achiving an almost equal coexistance hasn't been easy. Respect is a word that comes to mind.
And I don't neccessarilly like to label people so this entry should be seen as an attempt to identify different values found among adoptees not to place this and that person in one of these sections.
© Taste of Kimchi, Elle
Related posts:
Swedish Agencies
Glossary
Portrayals
Adoption & Religion
Thursday, 7 April 2011
Return To Sender
The following entry is based on my personal experience and I welcome comments, like always. Not all comments well be accepted for publishing,unfortunately though.
Adoption of any child be it infant or toddler is very convinent in a way especially for busy carrier centered women and women in show business like the fashion industry and Hollywood. For models and actresses they usually risk lossing income and reputation as well as popularity if they decide to start a family the ordinary way, but if they decide to skip the pregnancy thing they seem able to enjoy both sides of the world.
The joy of motherhood and a stable income. To choose adoption just because of its conveniance is in my eyes pure selfishness. I mean women that delibrately chooses adoption even though they could concive naturally that to me seems to be nothing else than selfishness and lazyness.
In that comparision adoption seems more convinent but unless you're not filthy rich or Madonna you are likely to be forced to wait for years. But then if its so easy to become a parent shouldn't it be just as easy to annul it? Well, no it shouldn't be, that to me is just cruel. But even so it does happen that adoptions go wrong, that adoptive parents regret their decision or simply can't keep their bundle of joy.
© Taste of Kimchi, Elle
Adoption of any child be it infant or toddler is very convinent in a way especially for busy carrier centered women and women in show business like the fashion industry and Hollywood. For models and actresses they usually risk lossing income and reputation as well as popularity if they decide to start a family the ordinary way, but if they decide to skip the pregnancy thing they seem able to enjoy both sides of the world.
The joy of motherhood and a stable income. To choose adoption just because of its conveniance is in my eyes pure selfishness. I mean women that delibrately chooses adoption even though they could concive naturally that to me seems to be nothing else than selfishness and lazyness.
In that comparision adoption seems more convinent but unless you're not filthy rich or Madonna you are likely to be forced to wait for years. But then if its so easy to become a parent shouldn't it be just as easy to annul it? Well, no it shouldn't be, that to me is just cruel. But even so it does happen that adoptions go wrong, that adoptive parents regret their decision or simply can't keep their bundle of joy.
Above picture of my lovely plant in my old place, unfortunately that plant didn't survive the heavy summer rain this summer...
If they would have been more prepared or had a larger social security net, they might never decided to annul the adoption or let alone initate an adoption process in the first place. Do you realize how many separations that child of yours would have to go through just because of you? Don't take to easy way out, just because things might get complicated. You're supposed to be the safe heaven for that child. Don't blame the child for its history or come with lame excuses. And please don't believe you can decide to return to sender. In adoptions or any family building their shouldn't be a reclamation period.
Yet I'm aware of the fact that sometimes, it might not be ideal for the child to stay with it's birth parents but I also assume that people generally are less openminded towards relinquishing a child born by their blood and maybe not so much when there are no blood relations.
Before commenting; be aware of the fact that this entry may be more or less biased , and you'll probably not like this post and may not even agree with me. But please leave religious things out of this and please don't try to promote, defend or speak in favour of adoptive parents. This post was written by an adoptee which means it is written from another perspective.
© Taste of Kimchi, Elle
Wednesday, 6 April 2011
Swedish Prime Ministers And Politicians
Below a list of Swedish politicans and (ministers), some may be relatively unknown while others may be more familiar. Have you heard of anyone them before?
Prime Ministers
Related posts:
General Election
Cinnemon Bun Day
New Era
Jean Baptiste
Things To Do II
Prime Ministers
- Olof Palme
- Ingvar Karlsson
- Carl Bildt
- Ingvar Karlsson
- Göran Persson
- Fredrik Reinfeldt
- Hakan Juholt
- Torbjorn Falldin
- Svante Lundkvist
- Kjell Olof Faldt
- Lena Hjelm Wallén
- Odd Engstrom
- Mona Sahlin
- Margareta Winberg
- Marita Ulvskog
- Lars Engqvist
- Bosse Ringholm
- Erik Asbrink
- Beatrice Ask
- Jan Bjorklund
- Maud Olofsson
- Bo Lundgren
- Alf Svensson
- Gudrun Shyman
- Goran Hagglund
- Lars Leijonborg
- Thomas Bodstrom
- Anna Lindh
- Leif Pagrotsky
- Bjorn Von Sydow
- Ulrika Messing
- Ylva Johansson
- Thomas Ostros
- Maria Wetterstrand
- Peter Eriksson
- Gustav Fridolin
Related posts:
General Election
Cinnemon Bun Day
New Era
Jean Baptiste
Things To Do II
Tuesday, 5 April 2011
Korean Cuisine
I really like to keep my link to Korea fresh in my mind and I've been considering weither or not I should try to cook some Korean cuisine. This is a big challenge for me since I for one don't know any authentic reciepes. Furthermore, not one of my family members are especially appricative of Korean cuisine except for 갈비 Kalbi/galbi and 삼겹살 Samgyeopsal. I have tried to make my own interpretation of Bibimbap and also fastfood noodles which I add a raw egg in while hot and mix with stirr fried vegetables. Really yummy and the closest I can come to ramen noodles, I suppose. So who would eat it if I cooked it?
I honestly believed we had passed this stage by now, but I seem to have been mistaken. Last week I had another exam and on top of that I have a re-exam in a few days. Since I felt like I needed to prepare for my test instead of going to my class I decided to stay home and study. When dad came home he became really, really annoyed with me for skipping school which isn't compulsory by the way. I tried to explain it to him but he replayed with something about me quiting the entire course and then he sort of forced me into promising that I would attend next class. Hello !? I'm over 20 by now not 10, so is there anything wrong with this picture .... ?
Do you end up in these kind of arguments with your parents ? How can you get out of them ?
© Taste of Kimchi, Elle
Related posts:
Korean Food
Make Korean Food
Dad And I
Kitchen Experiments
I honestly believed we had passed this stage by now, but I seem to have been mistaken. Last week I had another exam and on top of that I have a re-exam in a few days. Since I felt like I needed to prepare for my test instead of going to my class I decided to stay home and study. When dad came home he became really, really annoyed with me for skipping school which isn't compulsory by the way. I tried to explain it to him but he replayed with something about me quiting the entire course and then he sort of forced me into promising that I would attend next class. Hello !? I'm over 20 by now not 10, so is there anything wrong with this picture .... ?
Do you end up in these kind of arguments with your parents ? How can you get out of them ?
© Taste of Kimchi, Elle
Related posts:
Korean Food
Make Korean Food
Dad And I
Kitchen Experiments
Monday, 4 April 2011
Randomness
If it only was possible to survive on literature and books alone, then I wouldn't feel hungry. When it comes to books that interests me apart from books about Korea and Korean history I'm also very found of English classics. Like Margret Mitchell's Gone With The Wind, North And South triology by John Jakes, Wuthering Heights by Emily Brontë and Jane Eyre by Charlotte Brontë.
A smaller selection books I loved and read, once. Who's your favorite author(s)?
© Taste of Kimchi, Elle
Related posts:
Storybook Heroes
- Canterbury Tales by Geoffrey Chaucer
- The Tempest by William Shakespeare
- Romeo and Juliet by William Shakespeare
- A Midsummer's Night's Dream by William Shakespeare
- Robinson Crusoe by Alexander Selkirk
- Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen
- Sense and Sensibility by Jane Austen
- Lord Byron
- John Keats
- Tess of D'Uberville by Thomas Hardy
- Little Women by Louisa May Alcott
- Virgina Wolf
- D.H Lawrence
- Anne of Green Gables by L.M Montgomery
- Atonement by Ian MacEwan
A smaller selection books I loved and read, once. Who's your favorite author(s)?
© Taste of Kimchi, Elle
Related posts:
Storybook Heroes
Sunday, 3 April 2011
Mini Blog Break
Today I'm not feeling in the mood to blog about anything, period. Instead I'm trying to live my life but I suppose you'll here from me again very soon...
In the mean time do pop in to my other blog and read some of the stuff there and especially this two posts Likely stigmas and Korean economy maybe there will be more thoughtful stuff published there soon, when it happens I sure will let you know.
© Taste of Kimchi, Elle
Related posts:
Pain
Advice
Demolished
Don't Read
Challenge
Blame
Don't Cry
Opinions
Kimchi Bread And Meatballs
In the mean time do pop in to my other blog and read some of the stuff there and especially this two posts Likely stigmas and Korean economy maybe there will be more thoughtful stuff published there soon, when it happens I sure will let you know.
© Taste of Kimchi, Elle
Related posts:
Pain
Advice
Demolished
Don't Read
Challenge
Blame
Don't Cry
Opinions
Kimchi Bread And Meatballs
Saturday, 2 April 2011
Swedish Popular Trend
Below the answer to what Italian bread I was making the other day...
But actually this post was supposed to be about Swedish trends somewhat and not traditional Italian baking. despite the fun I find in it.
I suppose most of Americans and foreigners might be aware of the Swedish crime stories the most recent one would be The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, but also Wallander although I confess that nothing comes close to the original Wallander, Krister Henriksson. And the female lead, portrayed by none other than Noomi Rapace has since begun acting and filming in the States.
Another Swedish crime story is about the policeman Martin Beck, known as Beck. Portrayed by Peter Haber.
And another very, very popular series in Sweden these days are the comedy series titled Solsidan, following the life of upper class life in a posh part of the capital city. And yes they live in the posh side so yes one can assume that they might be suppoerts of the New Moderate Party.
And previously another comedy series called Svensson, Svensson was taking place in a middle class family in a smaller city. They father was a postman and the mother was a bank employee and they had two children one son and one daughter. That series started airing in the 1990s but made a slight comeback in 2007 which continued until 2008. Apparently they are now producing a movie with Susanne Reuter as the mum, and Allan Svensson as the dad they have both kept portraying their roles since the start in 1994.
© Taste of Kimchi, Elle
Related posts:
Common Views
Jante
Tummen And Laban
Unpatriotic Swede
Swedish Weather
Still no clue then this might help...
If you guessed Ciabatta then you're correct...
But actually this post was supposed to be about Swedish trends somewhat and not traditional Italian baking. despite the fun I find in it.
I suppose most of Americans and foreigners might be aware of the Swedish crime stories the most recent one would be The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo, but also Wallander although I confess that nothing comes close to the original Wallander, Krister Henriksson. And the female lead, portrayed by none other than Noomi Rapace has since begun acting and filming in the States.
Another Swedish crime story is about the policeman Martin Beck, known as Beck. Portrayed by Peter Haber.
And another very, very popular series in Sweden these days are the comedy series titled Solsidan, following the life of upper class life in a posh part of the capital city. And yes they live in the posh side so yes one can assume that they might be suppoerts of the New Moderate Party.
And previously another comedy series called Svensson, Svensson was taking place in a middle class family in a smaller city. They father was a postman and the mother was a bank employee and they had two children one son and one daughter. That series started airing in the 1990s but made a slight comeback in 2007 which continued until 2008. Apparently they are now producing a movie with Susanne Reuter as the mum, and Allan Svensson as the dad they have both kept portraying their roles since the start in 1994.
© Taste of Kimchi, Elle
Related posts:
Common Views
Jante
Tummen And Laban
Unpatriotic Swede
Swedish Weather
Friday, 1 April 2011
Namdaemung Market Seoul
I can't believe it's April already, but sadly it is. Today is official April Fools Day, but the pictures in this post isn't fake or anything. And yes they're from Namdaemung and yes they're mine.
Related posts:
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)