Monday, 9 April 2012

What's It Like

If I would be able to choose where I'd like to live I would choose Korea. That's more than just a fact a wish or whatever. And I have connections in Korea ; but not just my first family. People don't seem to realize that if you're adopted from the same country and in the same age you have many things in common and you might share other things. So yes, I know other KADS as well.

Sometimes I still wonder how I can make my second parents realize that the person that they used to know doesn't live any longer... Or she does, I'm still around but by changing my personal name I changed a part of my identity but they refuse to see it that way. I don't know how I can make them realize how much I really changed...

At this point in time I wonder what I need to do too get my message across, do I need to make the ultimate sacrifice just too make them realize that it's more than just fix idea or plain stupidity or stubborness... Would I have to renounce myself from them, cutting of all ties with them. Living my childhood, my teens, my ubringbing and all memories behind...

I'm not sure anymore all I know is too things at this point in time. One; my adoption is starting to get the best out of me. Society dictates what they expect of you, and then you just can't be a person with one foot in Europe and the other overseas. You have too make a choice or not be as close to your first family as you might attempt to be or even like too be. To me that's sounds just backwards.

Two: I don't like living in Sweden, not any longer. There are too much prejudices and presumptions around people who aren't ethnically Europeans or Swedes in particular. Basically, I think anywhere else is better than here. Sweden is way to bureaucratic these days, wanting to do everything by the book. And don't get me started on the rationalizations, they're everywhere!!! Instead of lowering the unemployment rate , it seems like companies and employees are more interested in maximizing their earnings and producations replacing man with machines.

©Taste of Kimchi, Elle

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