Although it happened several years ago I can still remember all those hurtful words and comments and the laughing and the smiles. I was bullied in school which probably is why I these days see myself with their eyes. I've tried to look passed it but it's hard, things from ones childhood can really determine what person you become as an adult.
I know I'm not the only one that was bullied as a child, it's really easy to be when you're another ethnicity because you stick out you can never hide or just melt in. Then of course people seemed to bother quite a lot about me being adopted, told me things like I should go back to where I came from and that my mum and dad wasn't really my real parents.
I know children can be cruel not just because they always say what's on their mind, I wish more people could be like that more honest and not beat around the bush. A child can act a certain way and still become a nice person as an adult I know that. But even so I still have a hard time getting passed all that's in the past because honestly speaking it made me feel very sad. Like I didn't deserve things, now I know better at least that's what I try to tell myself. I was born therefore I deserve everything my heart desires and I shouldn't have to feel bad about it. Yet people are surprised when they see me in person but that's just because they don't know about my childhood I suppose.
That's one reason why I liked my stay in Korea and meeting all other KADS from all over the world, we understood each other. But I never told them about my childhood or anything like that but still I felt happy, calm and secure.
So no I don't really like Sweden or at least not the place where was raised, maybe because it's sort of like a Swedish suburb. And that's another reason for wanting to move abroad back to my birth country even though I don't expect things to be easier. But still...
Adopted children don't choose their new parents or where they grow up, they basically have no say.
Sorry but that's the cold hard truth don't like it, then don't keep reading...
© Taste of Kimchi, Elle
Related posts:
Birthday Party
Snow White
10 Years
No comments:
Post a Comment